Daring to step upon the platform of facing that which I used to call who I am, and how I serve, I did not expect nor were I prepared to meet Jesus there waiting for me.
With great joy, excitement and anticipation I picked up my mother at the bus station yesterday. We are so much alike it is sometimes scary. This I say with great love in my heart for this special woman. With a deep need do really get to know her I have been blessed to have time truly away from the hold my parents had on me. I loved them to the extent that they became my idols. After some time, growth and perspective apart and looking to the Truth for truth, I can truly get to know them. This short two days have already been filled with grace and love as I came to see her as the darling daughter of our Father, in her own right being loved for who she is.
My burning subjecting experience of detachment was only in truth my misunderstanding of who she is, and who I am. Seeing her strengths and gifts that she has to offer to the body, I come to see that we are indeed not the same. We are separately special for God, and indispensible for the functioning of the church. Yet which is unmistakably true is the need that we both harbour for our loving Leader, Husband and Friend directing us towards our loving, faithful Father.
No amount of words can undo the loss of these past years of misunderstanding, and no amount of tears can communicate the anguish felt for misguided detached families. This may be my own display of the deep change and movement God works within me to understand something of His love for the church. But staying in this unfulfilling lie is not just a denial of who Jesus is and what He has done for us, but it is also a denial of what is to be seen in the church as family. How willing are we to experience holy discontent with what is undeniably in contrast with what true family should be, what the church truly should be.
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